Guess what I had for dinner Tuesday night?
Pizza.
Guess what I'm having for dinner tonight?
Chinese food.
I had a (small) bowl of chips sitting in front of the tv last night....at 10pm. I had a VENTI Strawberry & Creme Blended Frappucin WITH Whip this afternoon. That'd be the uber large for you folks who don't speak Starbucks. And just for good measure, that ginormous blended deliciousness is the ONLY thing that has made it's way into my stomach today other than the teeny tiny Diet Pepsi I am drinking as I sit here.
You can imagine how well my search for my feet is doing. It's going really well. When I sit down on my recliner and put the foot rest up, there are my feet! See? I told you I could do it!
Yeah yeah, ok...I get it. I'm supposed to be able to stand up straight, look down and see my feet. As if it wasn't bad enough that my boobs are in the way, there's also a huge belly there. Seriously, I'm giving Santa a run for his money. How sad is that?
So why am I sitting here telling you in advance of the bad choice I know I'm going to make this evening when I sit down to plow my way through a plate of greasy goodness? Because I'm human dammit! I know that I should be having a salad instead. I know that that salad should have a side of water with an exercise chaser. I know all these things. But I also know that this has been quite a stressful week. I spent Monday in the ER, and since then Girl Spawn has gotten pretty sick. What better way to cope than to eat copious amounts noodles & pork?
I have begun to be very aware of my issues surrounding food, and those are things that I will attempt to explore in the coming weeks and months. I know that I am incredibly unhealthy right now. Those bad food choices up there though? They're unusual for me right now. I've been eating pretty well. Yes of course I slip up....but it's becoming (thankfully) less frequent now.
The ultimate irony as I prepare to eat triple my weight back in calories tonight? I'm watching Oprah's show on Kirstie Alley and other heavy weight people. Yeah. I'm pathetic.
We're all human, and when we're stressed, we turn to food. You can't beat yourself up about it. All you can do is try to do better the next time. What worked for me was rather than eliminating stuff from my diet all at once, I weaned myself off my favorites while adding in alot more fruits and veggies. Another piece of assvice? Commit to changing just one thing per week. One week it could be to drink more water every day. The next it's to add more veggies. The next it's to exercise more, and so on. Get one good habit down before you take on another one. Take care of yourself, chickie. I need my Madwoman fixes. :)
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