So I was thinking about yesterday's post where I said I had lost 1.2 kgs and my current weight is 135.2. THAT got me to thinking that I could have SWORN that the lady wrote down a different weight on my card. So I went back and looked.
Sure enough, my actual weight this week was 134.8 kgs (296.56 lbs). I guess all I heard was "well done, you lost 1.2 kgs". Except I actually lost 1.6 kgs (3.52 lbs).
YAY!
That means that my total loss so far is : 23.8 kgs (52.36 lbs)!!
And I was totally kidding in my title.....the poor woman was busy as a bee trying to get all of us processed through the line up, so I won't hold it against her that she got my loss wrong. At least she wrote down the correct weight!
Things are still just carrying on over here. I missed a couple of weeks at Weight Watchers due to work, broken car and just a lot of stress in a lot of areas of my life. During those couple of weeks, my weight pretty much stayed the same - no more than a couple hundred grams up or down. I'll update about this week's weigh in later in the post.
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I find I still struggle, a lot, with emotional eating and for the last two weeks, I have fought the urge to raid the pantry every time I find myself grappling with my feelings. I don't want to be the girl who chows down on a pint of ice cream when she's sad. I don't want to inhale an entire party size bag of chips when I'm stressed about my work/family life balance. Nor do I want to be the girl who gorges on bunch of junk food to celebrate the successes.
For years, my eating has been very much tied to my emotions. Instead of dealing, appropriately, with my stress/anger/sadness/boredom/happiness/excitement.....I eat. It is something that I will likely always fight. It is something that I will likely never completely overcome and something that I will always need to be aware of. I hope it's something that my own daughter will never have to deal with.
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My October: Going the Distance Challenge has been going ok. This past Thursday, I did a LOT of walking. I walked to the school to get the kids (2 kms) and then walked home, at high speed to keep up with them on their scooters (2 kms). Later on I needed to go to work. Thanks to my car being in the shop and my step father's car being a bit sick as well, I ended up walking there and back (7.2 kms round trip). I was incredibly tired by the time I got home and found myself in bed very early.
I think all the walking helped though, because I did have a loss on the scales this week.
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I'm sure many of you have seen this article, by Marie Claire writer Maura Kelly, this week. It's been linked on Facebook, Twitter, multiple blogs and even in some emails I've received. I'm still actually digesting it and processing my own thoughts on the subject. I will do a post on it, in more detail, next week but for now I'll say that on the whole I think it was a very provocative post (duh!) and that she made one or two points that I agreed with in a SMALL way. But like I said, more on that later.
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Something that I am trying desperately to foster in my daughter is a healthy sense of self esteem. BUT!! I don't want it to stem from her perception of beauty. I want her to believe in herself as a whole. She needs to see herself as attractive inside AND out. I want her to be comfortable in her own skin, and happy with who she is as a person.
So, when our dear friend Medic posted the link to this video on Facebook, I was rapt. It is so fantastic. Please listen to ALL the words as she speaks. It really is amazing.
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So my loss for this week. After such a long, drawn out, plateau over the Winter, I am happy to say that Spring is looking up for me. I lost 1.2 kgs (2.64 lbs). That brings my total loss so far to 23.4 kgs (51.48 lbs).
I feel like I have slid backwards to about 6 months ago when my motivation was starting to wane. It was about that time that I started cheating a bit. I would eat a biscuit but wouldn't track it. I would have a real Coke instead of diet and not track it. I would eat a bigger portion than I should and only track the points for what the portion should have been. I would not go for a walk but I would give myself 2 activity points under the premise that I had done a fair bit of general walking around for work.
Silly.
And I feel like I've slid back there. I'm not sure why, I'm not entirely sure how to fix it, but I know it needs to stop.
I'm now a participant in the October Going The Distance challenge (#OctGTD). I have committed to doing 100 miles (about 166 kms) in the month of October...either walking in my neighbourhood or on the treadmill. I'm doing well so far, and I think that I needed the challenge. It seems to have pushed me in the right direction. I don't think it will show on the scales tonight, but we'll see.
What do YOU do when you're struggling and need to get back on track?
